You understand that your choice to end your marriage will impact your children. In order to minimize the potentially negative mental and emotional effects this decision may have on your kids, you and your spouse could decide to work together to create a reasonable custody and visitation plan. You may set aside your own personal feelings to discuss terms and negotiate with the kids’ best interests as your primary goal.
The more thorough your custody plan is, the less likely that you will experience complications and difficulties with the kids after the divorce is final. You can include details and terms that are specific to your individual situation, such as your unique work schedule or the medical needs of one of your kids. While creating a plan, you would be wise not to overlook the need for good transitions as your kids will be going between two homes.
Establishing a good routine
Going between two homes can be stressful for your kids, especially if they are young. One of the benefits of establishing seamless transitions is that it will provide a sense of stability and continuity of lifestyle for your children, even if you and your spouse have two very different approaches to how you run your home. Good transitions can start with the following:
- Have a specific pick-up and drop-off time and routine.
- Pick a neutral location that is not too far from either home to hand off kids.
- Have a regular household routine that remains the same each time the kids are at your house.
- Stay involved in your kids’ school activities and work, even if they are not with you.
- Allow your kids to maintain their social lives, regardless of which parent they are staying with.
- Allow the children to maintain communication with the other parent if they want while they are at your house.
By working together, you and the other parent can establish a routine that will make things less stressful and more peaceful for every member of the New Jersey family.
Sometimes, the most difficult time for a child is during and immediately after a divorce. This is why it is helpful to establish good transitions and routines as soon as possible after your separation. This consideration to your child’s needs can help protect him or her from additional stress during a difficult time.